Feast of Love

The unexpected is always upon us.  And of all the unexpected gifts given to me, this moment is the most precious one. (Morgan Freeman in the movie of Feast of Love)

Less than a week at home in Sydney is always invigorating, brings different perspective of life.  Most of the time when I arrived back in Jakarta, I brought with me a bag of mixed feelings, mostly sad.  Not this time! It was such a bliss and made me feel like I am drowning in the feast of love every step and every single minute.

We are not talking about big happening with capital B… it could be as simple as enjoying my lunch of risotto alla funghi with a glass of fresh lemon,lime and bitter, while watching a lunch time solo guitar performer at the Oxford Mall in Bondi Junction.  I was surrounded by the rays of sun and hey, look who were in the next table.  A fabulous gay couple preparing themself for the annual Mardi Gras parade on Mar01 along Oxford street in the City, I bet!  So engrossed in the conversation, but didn’t mind at all for me taking their pic, together with lovely gay waiter too.  Love them, they make life so colorful!

At home, my lemon tree grows very tall and bears so many fruits. When did this all happen?  Just sitting in the tiny courtyard of my home gives me so much peace and happiness.

The boys and I planned for a hearty meal the other evening.  We decided to go to Sahara, a turkish join in Burwood.  It has been established and around for a while, more than 3 years.  On the agenda I planned for a serious and heavy dialogue with them on our personal situation. Of course, at the end of our feast of mixed grilled platters which were entreed with various dip of humous, beet, chick peas, goat cheese and the beautiful fresh baked rotis.

In the middle of our conversation, it poured heavily and we moved inside the restaurant, for a warmer and cozier conversation.  Ahmed, the waiter, kept on checking on us, chatted, commented and told us his personal stories from home.  He said to the boys, to capture and seize this moment, having a conversation with mom, with such strength, proximity and intensity.  When we left, he said ‘take care of your sister, boys.’ It was supposed to be a compliment, I took that gleefully.

We moved next door at Gellatisimo for our much awaited dessert.  It took us a while to choose from so many enjoyment for the pallate.  I settled for a strong black coffee.  Outside, rain still poured.  We continued our conversation like there was no tomorrow.  There were so much to process and digest by now. Later, we went home by train.

Glenn and Gary never failed to amaze me on how they reacted to happenings and new experiences in life.  The latter subject that they had to deal with, definitely not easy, not commonly easy to find solution. But readily they can level with my thinking, they are neither partial or bias about my situation, thereof, they can accept whatever decision in life. Glenn did most of the reasoning and talking.  The almost 17-year-old little man said ‘Whatever your choice in life, as long as you are happy, mom – go for it!’ And who is this man again? A man who never thought that this year I will be in my mid 40’s and considered me younger and made me love him even better. Thanks, Gar!  They are so brave to embrace life, even on subject which is not easy to deal with.  This makes me feel even more grounded and confident to face the world.

Nothing makes me prouder than to be able to see in my sons’ eyes and even, telling a hurtful truth piece of life.  I can also see the full trust in them on how I will deal with the whole situation.  I am not saying by any means, what I have said or done so far is right or wrong.  It is just be.

No wonder I flew home last night, feeling full of bliss, greatful and complete.. only because I have experienced the feast of love.

Life can be cruel, but for now, I can only say, it is only good and a blessed one.  Let’s continue and venture to the next journey….

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